Zombie Origins

As every child who has ever asked their momma knows, zombies come from spores. Spores are wicked, little gobs of dusty fuzz that cling to the following: the undersides of plants, chewed up gum on the sidewalk, dried up mushrooms, carbon dioxide molecules, political parties, anti-gender tweets, socks, and of course in the vapor of […]

Traditions to Keep and Traditions to Lose

Not all traditions are worth keeping.┬áSome are good for the soul. Some traditions bring only temporary happiness. Some are horrible to everyone involved. For a tradition to be worth keeping, it has to have some lasting merit. There’s a simple tradition in my family of handing out candy on Halloween while watching a movie. This […]

Living Healthy While Killing The Neighbors

  This is my house, where I live. I don’t have diabetes, but the children in the neighborhood do. As you can see, someone stole my welcome mat. If I ever find out who did it, they’re going to meet the tiny flying products of my shotgun. I make my own shells, and I lace […]