Flip Flops


Ten things you can do with flip flops:

  1. Go to the beach.
  2. Use a public shower without worrying about fungus.
  3. Take it easy.
  4. Show off your toenail polish.
  5. Wear them with socks and sport the ninja look.
  6. Take them off and save your place in the line at the pharmacy while you sit.
  7. Feel the breeze on your toes.
  8. Cool your feet by walking through a stream, stepping in a wading pool, or turning on a hose.
  9. Sing along with Jimmy Buffett. (“Margaritaville!”)
  10. Take one off and slap somebody with it.


Ten things you probably shouldn’t do with flip flops:

  1. Go to the beach and try to hide your wallet in them.
  2. Mining.
  3. Ride a bike.
  4. Walk through a cow pasture.
  5. Climb a tree.
  6. Traffic court appearance.
  7. Welding.
  8. Lawn darts.
  9. Space exploration.
  10. Mow the lawn.


Published by Kurt Gailey

This is where I'm supposed to brag about how I've written seven novels, twelve screenplays, thousands of short stories, four self-help books, and one children's early-reader, but I'd rather stay humble. You can find out about things I've written or follow my barchive (web archive, aka 'blog) at xenosthesia.com or follow me on twitter @kurt_gailey. I love sports and music and books, so if you're an athlete or in a band or you're a writer, give me a follow and I'll most likely follow you back. I've even been known to promote other people's projects.

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