13 ways to define your love for V-day


Lines for your valentine you won’t likely find in a Hallmark card:


Nerdy: You’re the central node of my network.

Country: You’re like fresh eggs and warm milk.

City: You’re my 20th floor. What a beautiful view!

Fatty: You’re the canned cheese on my cracker.

Eerie: Yours is the only mind I want to read.

Hungry: You’re the peanut to my butter.

Hearty: I just look at you and my life is fulfilled.

Emotional: The flood in my eyes is for you.

Divine: You’re the warmth of Heaven.

Comfort: You’re a cool summer rain.

Comfort 2: You’re a warm fire in February.

Practical: You’re the log on my fire.

Eternal: Forever isn’t long enough.


+ some you should not even consider:

Bizarre: You line my mental nest.

Fart Joke: Did you just fart? ‘Cause you just blew me away.

Edgy: You’ve discovered the depth of my soul.

Serious: Either I’m having a heart attack, or I’m falling for you.

Straight-forward: Want to put your mouth on my mouth?

Game Show: Contestant number one! (point at your valentine)

Criminal: Resistance is futile.

Cryptic: Easy sauce on a spaghetti sammich.

Published by Kurt Gailey

This is where I'm supposed to brag about how I've written seven novels, twelve screenplays, thousands of short stories, four self-help books, and one children's early-reader, but I'd rather stay humble. You can find out about things I've written or follow my barchive (web archive, aka 'blog) at xenosthesia.com or follow me on twitter @kurt_gailey. I love sports and music and books, so if you're an athlete or in a band or you're a writer, give me a follow and I'll most likely follow you back. I've even been known to promote other people's projects.

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