Break Room Discovery

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The office break room is a scientific place.

Social psychology comes into play when certain people who don’t otherwise associate within the company go in there at the same time. Who sits where? Who gets the comfy chair? Who gets the microwave first? Who has to heat up their food among the drippy splatter from the previous careless user? What topics will come up in conversation? Will that one annoying guy talk about his colonoscopy again? Will the ladies discuss their pregnancies in detail? Will that guy who has too many cats in his house come in the break room and send everyone packing because he smells like his method of hygiene is to bath in a pool of one thousand cats? Will the boss come in and ruin every conversation? Will that gal with the political fetish come in and bore everyone to tears or bleeding ears? Will someone find their food has been stolen out of the refrigerator?

All of these questions will need further study. So will the unknown substance in that container on the bottom shelf at the back of the refrigerator. The container is, of course, clear. Everyone can see the stuff inside, but no one knows what it is. No one claims it. How did it get there in the first place? Did some outsider bring it in when no one was looking? Is there some serial leftover depositor out there in the city? If so, where will he strike next? In an office near you? In YOUR office? How will he ever get caught? Does he leave his fingerprints on the mysterious containers? Has he ever been caught on camera? Or is he able to avoid cameras like Bigfoot does? If Bigfoot worked in the office, would anyone know about that? Maybe he does, and he’s the one taking the lunches out of the break room fridge. The best thing to do then is set up one of those wildlife cameras and some bear traps inside some lunch sacks. Strategically placed sacks will capture either Bigfoot or the leftover depositor. Either way, scientific progress will have been made.

Published by Kurt Gailey

This is where I'm supposed to brag about how I've written seven novels, five screenplays, thousands of short stories, four self-help books, and one children's early-reader, but I'd rather stay humble. You can find out about things I've written or follow my barchive (web archive, aka 'blog) at xenosthesia.com or follow me on twitter @kurt_gailey. I love sports and music and books, so if you're an athlete or in a band or you're a writer, give me a follow and I'll most likely follow you back. I've even been known to promote other people's projects.

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