Fitness in Space


Treadmills. Ellipticals. Recumbent bikes.

All things of the past.

When we, the human race, go exploring the spaces between planets, we’ll need some exercise routines to help us prevent bone loss. Plus we might need to be fit when we get to wherever we’re going.

Spherical mills with artificial gravity will be great for lower body work. They’ll keep us toned in our glutes and calves and quads as we try to maintain our balance atop a rotating sphere big enough for four people. One of the fun parts of this exercise will be to try to make other users lose their balance.

Resistance will be key to a lot of our weight-training exercises, so of course no bearings will get any grease. Anything with a tendency to oxidize will have its oxidation potential maximized, to create even more resistance. Moving parts on our weight equipment will not ever be lubed, but sprayed with oxidizing agents to promote the rust. Better still, we’ll just spray things down with a shaken can of Pepsi. Then all the moving parts will be sticky. We’ll never wash it off and let the cosmic dust collect inside. Would a can of Pepsi make it all the way to outer space? Would some enterprising scientist conduct an experiment to find out the answer to that question? Thanks.

Of course, there will be a few of us who take advantage of the weightlessness of space and we’ll do a lot of “heavy” lifting of objects hundreds of times bigger than us. Then we’ll holler out to our buddy, while we have the satellite over our head, “Hey, take my picture!”

Whatever. It’s still a workout.

Protein pills. We’ll also swallow lots of protein pills.

That’s all. The future is in a pill.



Published by Kurt Gailey

This is where I'm supposed to brag about how I've written seven novels, twelve screenplays, thousands of short stories, four self-help books, and one children's early-reader, but I'd rather stay humble. You can find out about things I've written or follow my barchive (web archive, aka 'blog) at or follow me on twitter @kurt_gailey. I love sports and music and books, so if you're an athlete or in a band or you're a writer, give me a follow and I'll most likely follow you back. I've even been known to promote other people's projects.

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