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Strange Product Names

Along with those products which were unknowingly titled in such a way as to distance potential purchasers, there are products which are given names translating to something utterly bizarre in certain languages. Bite The Wax Tadpole is a famous example. The product it came from is not worth mentioning anyway, but even less so since the translated name is so much more fun to say than the original.

One strange name for a product which could seem strange, innocent, or even disgusting, depending on how you view it is Green Piles, a Japanese name for a lawn fertilizer.

Another one from Japan is a brand of beef jerky which they decided to name Homo Sausage. Just another name that could be seen in a variety of ways. Strange? Innocent? Disgusting? Would you buy it?

From Sweden, there’s Krapp, a special brand of toilet paper that believes in true advertising.

Again from Sweden, there’s Plopp, which is a chocolate bar. This name might make you think of something other than what the product really is.

And would you buy an orangeade type drink if it was called Pipi? You can find it in Yugoslavia. (See the image at the start of this article.)

In Czechoslovakia you could buy detergent named Polio. Not really. The Czechs were brilliant in getting rid of the disease polio because they administered the vaccine via sugar cubes and had a campaign endorsing soaps and detergents to further hygiene practices in their citizens. Their country was extremely successful in battling the disease, and the name Polio associated with detergent is a sort of urban legend.

Zit is a Greek lemon lime drink. No kidding. They make it with real natural ingredients. Sounds good to me.

Great Cat Names

There are good, better, and best cat names, just like there are all of those categories of dog names. The thing about cats though, is that calling them is a rare thing. Some pet-lovers are super devoted to their cats and so they do actually go outside and call. Letting the cat know it is dinner time is a definite sign of devotion. Most people I know who have cats either leave the food where the cat can get it when it’s ready, or they keep the cat inside the majority of the time. Not one of those options makes calling the cat by name necessary. At least, not loudly or publicly. I have also known one family who had a house full of God only knows how many cats. It was difficult to even walk past their house because it smelled viciously of cat egesta. That kind of person probably doesn’t even know how many cats are in their house, so how could they possibly have names for all of them? Thankfully, not all cat lovers are cat hoarders.

Naming cats is obviously different than naming dogs. With dogs, the owner is often raising his or her voice, then throwing something like a bone or a ball. With cats, the owner is often cooing the cat’s name softly, then petting it gently like it was a toy or a soft sweater.

So, for cats, the object is to give your feline friend a name that is clever and rolls smoothly off the tongue in a whisper. Some name like Killer. No, I’m just kidding about that one. But who am I to stop you? If you want to name your kitten Killer, it’s your prerogative.

Seriously though, cats need names like Boots, Socks, Tigger, Tiger, Patches, or Sly.

Other good names might include Whiskers, Hobbes, or Morris.

A lot of French names sound good for cats: Esmee, Elodie, Dijon, Gigi, Pepe, Genevieve, Michel, even Pierre.

Funny names shouldn’t be dismissed. Try Floofy, Boujee, Laser Eyes, Droog, Misfit, Horse Face, and Roadkill for some fun conversations around your neighbors—and of course, fantastically boosted self-esteem for your cat—as if a cat’s self-esteem would be determined by anything but the cat’s own will.

Recently Viewed, Tron: Ares

Photo by Marieke Schu00f6nfeld on Pexels.com

If you’re not familiar with my movie rating system, here’s a brief explanation: more complex than a thumbs-up/thumbs down system and more specific than an undefined star rating, my system rates seven factors of a story, assigning one star for each entertaining element.

Drawing power 1

Interest factor 1

Offensive factor 1

Range of emotion 1

Character factor 1

Style 0

Length 1

In Tron: Ares, there were great performances by Jodie Turner-Smith, Gillian Anderson, Jared Leto, Jeff Bridges, Evan Peters, and Greta Lee, to name a few. There was only one character who seemed annoying, but he had endearing moments.

The storyline had the draw to pull me in and there were enough plot elements to keep the movie interesting for me. Even though the trailer made the plot look dull and lifeless, it was not.

Style gets a zero, not because there was no style in the movie. It had great amounts of style. The music though was only mediocre. Especially since the movie tries to idolize one of the worst songs ever written, and that is “Just Can’t Get Enough” by Depeche Mode. That song, by the way, has one of the most ironic titles of a song as well, because, as anyone who has ever been forced to listen to it can testify, after the fourth reiteration of the title, which happens to also be every verse and chorus, you will be screaming angrily that you’ve had ENOUGH.

Offensive factor gets a star point because there really wasn’t anything offensive in the movie. Parents could watch the movie first to see if they agree. If you’re a more loose-control style of parent, you could just let your kid watch this without worries.

Despite being about artificial intelligence, the movie, and even the characters playing the AI, had great emotional range.

The length was fit for an Alfred Hitchcock viewing. Not too long on time, not too short on time. 1 hour, 59 minutes.

End result: Tron Ares gets 6 out of 7 stars.

By the way, the basic plot is that there is an AI created to be a soldier–Ares (played by Jared Leto). His purpose is questionable, and since he is built to learn, he begins questioning his purpose. His form is also, like a soldier, expendable. Perhaps because he is expendable, he is also temporary. Being temporary gets in the way of helping others, so a pursuit ensues for the bad side and the good side alike to recover a “permanence code”. The visuals are wonderful. For anyone wishing to escape for a while into a digital realm, this could be a beneficial diversion.

Year of the Robot

Forget everything you know about the zodiacs. It’s not the year of the tiger or the wolf, the yew tree or the Dodge Ram.

It’s the year of the robot.

Here’s a gigantic clue for the computer programmers of the world: WE, THE PEOPLE OF EARTH, DON’T WANT ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE, WE WANT ROBOTS.

Robots are superior to AI. One reason for that superiority is because they don’t need AI. They, the robots, are like humans in this way: they don’t need AI. They (the robots again) only need relatively basic instructions. The instructions needed are those to help accomplish whatever task the robot was built to perform.

Move here. Turn there. Avoid obstacles. Pick up heavy things. Move things elsewhere. Start over.

Photo by Catalina Carvajal Arango on Pexels.com

Of course, that sort of logic makes us think of factories and warehouses. These are the places where robots can be found already.

They are also found doing jobs which would otherwise put a human in a dangerous situation, such as bomb deactivation. That’s also a great place for robots. It’s also a place where robots have been already.

So, let’s talk about one place we absolutely need robots where they haven’t been utilized…yet. The perfect place for a robot is in Congress. First of all the recognizable benefits is we don’t have to pay them. Along those same lines is the fact that a robot would not kowtow to any lobbyist. A robot has no use for money, so it wouldn’t get bribed to vote one way or another. Sure we might be inclined to think a robot couldn’t take sides or vote the way the citizens would, especially the major party of the citizens the robot serves, but we would be thinking too deeply there. A robot with simple instructions would be far better prepared to serve a majority than any complex organism such as a human would. A more simple “brain” would be easier to regulate. With simple instructions for each robot representative, every individual person would easily detect a robot operating outside its set protocol.

Before we carry that to all the sections of the government, remember it would be no good to have a robot in a position where it (that fantastic robot) would be required to pass judgment on a human. So, the justice department is no place for a robot. We wouldn’t want robot judges or robot cops. We have to have people in those jobs because they might be able to exhibit some sympathy toward those they serve. A robot can’t sympathize.

Another place to have robots is wherever there is a bad smell. Plumbers and civil engineers have known this for years. They never send a human down into the sewers if a robot or a remote control rover is available. One super cool thing robots can do, which is like sniffing, but not quite the same, is they can detect the exact makeup of the air around them. If we were trying to find out who was dumping chemicals in the sewer system and the robot detected toluene, we might suspect any nearby paint manufacturers or distributors. If the robot detected boatloads of CO2, we might suspect any nearby coffee bean processing plants.

Call up your local AI and tell it, “Build me a robot.” Or call up your friend the computer programmer and tell him or her to put down the keyboard and pick up a wrench. Tell your friend to get cracking on making more robots. Let’s get robots that make robots, robots that fix robots, robots that fetch the mail and mow the lawn and pick up the dog doo doo, and of course, robots that look perfectly at home in Washington D.C.

One More Thing

If you didn’t think of the fabulous Jackie Chan Adventures cartoon when you read the title of this article, then you will do yourself a great favor by looking it up now. Go ahead, I’ll wait.

…….

Okay, so where did you find it? Were you able to at least get the idea of what it is? A fun show for kiddies? Yes. A fun cartoon for fans of Jackie Chan? You know it.

Well, the world is seriously wanting a talent like him back in the cinema-art machine. His cartoon wasn’t the only thing he did right. He had a prolific career making movies that put you on the edge of your seat. Watching Jackie Chan movies was especially intense knowing he did all of his own stunts. On some movies, as a treat at the end, he would even share the variety of do-overs he had while performing some of those stunts. He fell off a lot of things, got hit by objects he was swinging or kicking, and once or twice took a blow to the head unintentionally.

There were a few of his early movies in which he credited other people with doing some of his stunts. Not too many. He eventually created enough of a following that he could demand to be the one in the middle of all the action.

Some of his stunts, you just watch them in awe and say, “No way. How did he do that?”

Skills. The man has, and has had, skills. He showed how he could be lightning quick with a punch or a kick, acrobatic, and strong as a jungle cat.

We could say he followed in the footsteps of Bruce Lee, but Jackie would tell us he followed equally in the footsteps of Buster Keaton, an early film star who did comedy films with a physical element sometimes known as “slapstick comedy”.

The physical element may have been started by Keaton, but it was perfected by Chan.

A short list of some of my favorite Jackie Chan movies would definitely include:

1. The Forbidden Kingdom

2. The Legend of Drunken Master

3. Shanghai Noon

4. Who Am I?

And of course, you can’t ignore his voice work in the Kung Fu Panda movies or his own cartoon, Jackie Chan Adventures.

Looking for a comedy movie, an action movie, or both combined? You should do yourself a solid favor and check out some action-packed hilarity in a Jackie Chan movie or cartoon.