How To Quatro

How to role-play:

1. Obtain 12-sided die.
2. Create map.
3. Paint miniatures.
4. Use your imagination.
5. Dread the return to reality.

How to be unscientific:

1. Latch on to common chestnuts.
2. Spout common chestnuts at every possible moment.
3. Pretend everyone else is less intelligent.
4. Argue for narrow-minded ideas.
5. Get offended at disagreements with your bias.

How to be scientific:

1. Learn to use words such as: experiment, unbiased, dedication.
2. Actually operate in an unbiased way.
3. Never be satisfied with single results.
4. Always repeat experiments.
5. Be dedicated to learning.

How to live:

1. Breathe.
2. Keep a heartbeat.
3. Get a puppy.
4. Relax when it’s time. Work when it’s time.
5. Make space for others.
6. Enjoy the variety.

How to win at video games:

1. Never turn 13.
2. Exercise your thumbs.
3. Hang your tongue out a little to keep your balance.

How to save money:

1. Eat less.
2. Want less.
3. Wear it ’til it’s worn out.
4. Use it ’til it doesn’t work.
5. Don’t fear any ridicule—accept no peers.

How to be religious:

1. Study the nature of your spirit.
2. Study nature.
3. Study scripture.
4. Meditate and pray.
5. Be fearless.

How to write a novel:

1. Brew coffee.
2. Pour that crap out because you don’t want a headache or osteoporosis.
3. Go straight for the Jager.
4. Wear leather jacket and nothing else.
5. Pound keyboard for 17 consecutive hours.
6. Wake up for hangover and hate.
7. Hate the thing you wrote.
8. Throw that crap out because you don’t want the headache or eyestrain.
9. Repeat process every 3 days.