Looking for a car metaphor.

Like running the wipers on a dry day.

Fixing the engine when the tires are all flat.

Like driving with your lights on in the daytime.

Peaceful as driving slower than necessary through a tree-lined street.

Like putting small wheels on a car and thinking it’s fast.

Like putting giant wheels on a car and thinking it’s a truck.

Not nearly as loud as taking off the muffler and turning the radio up!

Like trading a Ferrari for a Ford.

Throwing the keys under the seat and expecting to start the car.

Like comparing apples to lugnuts.

Like burning down your garage to make the RV fit.

Putting a pizza in it and calling it “air freshner”.

Emptying the gas tank and then telling someone else their tank is empty. Expecting everyone to drive courteously when all you do is call everyone else an idiot and fly the bird.

Like adding excessive amps so you don’t have to hear all the people calling each other idiots.

Like honking the horn at a herd of cows.

Like driving blind.

Like decking out the chrome and the window tint.

Like washing it one day before rain. Like washing it before you go mudding. Like wishing you could go mudding, but you’re driving a convertible.

Like putting diesel fuel in when your car drives on unleaded.

Like driving your car into the ocean.

Driving through the carwash with all the windows down.

Like fossil fuel and new technology.

Like racing around only to find you never left your yard.

Published by Kurt Gailey

This is where I'm supposed to brag about how I've written seven novels, twelve screenplays, thousands of short stories, four self-help books, and one children's early-reader, but I'd rather stay humble. You can find out about things I've written or follow my barchive (web archive, aka 'blog) at xenosthesia.com or follow me on twitter @kurt_gailey. I love sports and music and books, so if you're an athlete or in a band or you're a writer, give me a follow and I'll most likely follow you back. I've even been known to promote other people's projects.

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