Flip Flops

Ten things you can do with flip flops:

1. Go to the beach.
2. Use a public shower without worrying about fungus.
3. Take it easy.
4. Show off your toenail polish.
5. Wear them with socks and sport the ninja look.
6. Take them off and save your place in the line at the pharmacy while you sit.
7. Feel the breeze on your toes.
8. Cool your feet by walking through a stream, stepping in a wading pool, or turning on a hose.
9. Sing along with Jimmy Buffett. (“Margaritaville!”)
10. Take one off and slap somebody with it.

Ten things you probably shouldn’t do with flip flops:

1. Go to the beach and try to hide your wallet in them.
2. Mining.
3. Ride a bike.
4. Walk through a cow pasture.
5. Climb a tree.
6. Traffic court appearance.
7. Welding.
8. Lawn darts.
9. Space exploration.
10. Mow the lawn.