I don’t want anybody to feel left out, so I’m making a list of things you can choose to make you offended. There’s no priority here. Find the one that fits you best. After all, it must be a fun game, being offended, since everyone seems to be doing it.
1. Be offended at people who make their name all fluffy with a special font.
2. Be offended at those who spout quotes without caring for the true source.
3. Find offense in anyone who walks the same path as you.
4. Be offended that socks are still built with the intention of having the seams on the inside.
5. Take offense at anyone who has no idea.
6. Take offense at the ones who shared the idea you wish you said first.
7. Be offended at those who make little effort.
8. Be offended that Twinkies don’t have more filling.
9. Be offended that abdominal muscles are temporary.
10. Offense is easy when you’re in public. Be uncommon and take offense in private.
11. Be offended that time resists change no matter how often we mess with our clocks.
12. Be off ended at extra spaces in writing.
13. Take offense at cats only getting 9 lives when video gamers get infinity.
14. Take offense against movies with substandard music.
15. Find offense in pillows too big to stuff in your ears.
16. Find offense in everyone who gets a good night sleep and a next meal.
17. Be offended that the thought of being homeless just crossed your mind.
18. Be offended about persuasion and influence and manipulation.
19. Be offended when the numbers aren’t rounded off.
Xenosthesia.com 