There once was a smarter than average guy who attached sparklers to his spokes, lit the sparklers and rode around in the not-so-dark night on a 4th of July. It looked really cool as the sparkling fire spun, but the guy was wearing shorts, so his legs got burnt on every rotation.
More than one guy has built a jump on the edge of a lake. Many of them have jumped, caught air, and landed in the lake. It’s all fun and games unless the lake is too deep for you to recover your bike.
One time I saw a kid trying to do a backflip on a gap-jump on his BMX but he didn’t quite rotate far enough and landed on his face. He cried for a while, but eventually got back on his bike and rode away. Young bones bend instead of breaking.
Countless people have been caught on Halloween trying to ride a bike while wearing a cape, like a vampire. Guess where the cape ends up getting caught.
Not so dum, but funny anyway, is the gal who rode her road bike on one of those moving walkways, like at the airport. Hey, if you can get away with it, go for it. (I wonder how fast she was going.)
Soooo many bike races, of every kind, have been held on rainy days. When rain and dirt mix they make mud. When mud gets deep enough, and thick enough, you don’t just ride through it, you collect it. When you collect enough on your bike, the wheels no longer rotate. Racers end up carrying their bikes.
Another not so dum, but fun thing: Paniers can be a cool way to carry your stuff. Or your pets. Yes indeed, a lot of people let their pets ride around in the paniers.
Is it a coincidence that most dum things are done on BMX bikes? You can count on that guy next door for a laugh every time he tries to pick up some beer from the 7-11 and transport it home on his BMX. No he hasn’t invested in paniers, and he drops the case multiple times on his way.
And after the guys drink the beer, why do they always think it’s so funny to ride the toddler bikes? Get off it, old man, you’re going to break it!
Last, but not least of the dum, is the Florida man who tried to steal two bikes, while riding a bike. First off, why does he think he needs to steal bikes if he already has a bike? Next, how did he steer? With his knees? It doesn’t matter. He got caught, of course, because he couldn’t go far with all three bikes without tripping over himself. Hopefully the people got their stolen bikes back. The lesson to us all is: Be satisfied with what you’ve got, even when what you’ve got upstairs is not a lot.
Xenosthesia.com 