Football

I’m a mountain biker. That fact doesn’t preclude or necessitate a dislike for football, whether it’s the North-American type about dudes in nylons slapping each other’s butts or the European/South-American kind with murderous, bloodthirsty fans. Being a mountain biker doesn’t mean you have to dislike football; however, because I’m an outsider, I’m in the perfect point to give you an outsider’s point of view. I’ve never painted a number on my chest or thrown a cash wager on a team. I’ve never gone to a stadium to watch the “action” up close. A few times I’ve enjoyed watching games on television or even local games in fields where the seating is whatever you brought, but I can tell you with definitive experience it’s much more fun to PLAY either type of football than to watch. Watching is the lowest form of any kind of sport, for sure. Watching any kind of football is like watching the Titanic sink—there’s an entertaining gurgle sometime between beginning and end—but the end is just sad. People paid for tickets, you know what I mean? One thing I absolutely love about North-American football is that fans wearing Raiders gear are the equivalent of punk rock fans wearing Misfit t-shirts. Some are all dark and brooding, super serious about their fanaticism. Others are just wearing it because they truly like the band/team. And don’t forget the street cred, dude!