Ghosting is a vile thing to do to someone. However, it can be done with style and skill.
Ghosting, by the way, means to ignore someone’s efforts at getting your attention. It’s usually used in reference to text messages or emails. When those text messages and emails go unanswered, they have been “ghosted”. The person who sent them has also “been ghosted” and should, understandably, be upset.
Although you might think the person who got ghosted always has the higher ground. Not quite. Most of the time this would be true, but not always. There are some cases where the ghosting is absolutely necessary for social norms to be observed. A particularly annoying person might be better to avoid giving a response rather than risking further communications. Does that mean you’re not cowardly for avoiding them? Probably the opposite is true. You’re a coward. Don’t want to be a coward? Just dive in and let them know how they’re being annoying. Maybe you could help them fix the problem. Maybe you could find something in common with them and gain a friend. Or maybe you’ve already tried all that and the person refused to hear your suggestions to make it all better. In that last case, you may need to know HOW to ignore them.
It can be done. To ghost with style is not a common skill. Most people will ignore someone’s email, then show up in the company break room within the same hour. Even less qualified is the person who sits in the company break room with the person they ghosted and talks to another co-worker about emails. That’s how ghosting is vile. Vile, not style.
To do it with true style, it’s best to remove yourself from society completely. If you must ignore one person’s communication, you’ll have to ignore them all. Go hermit. Go live in the wilderness for a while. There really is no better reason than to say, “I was off-grid.”
Sign up for jury duty. It’s common knowledge that people on a jury are not allowed to communicate with the rest of the world. Of course you couldn’t respond to text messages—you were under court orders not to. That’s not an excuse, that’s a reason. And yes, that’s ghosting in style.
Long-boarding in Iceland is a fantastic way to avoid getting cellular phone service. No way you could answer while you’re on the board anyway. Only a heartless fiend would want you to respond while you’re on the board, rocketing downhill, using the palms of your hands as rudders. What would they expect, for you to risk missing the turn just so you could make them feel like their text message was worthy of your time? Not likely.
Surfing. Any water sport really would be a legitimate way to say you were unable to respond to anyone’s digital comms. You’re not surfing with a phone in your pocket.
Cleanse the Earth by volunteering to bring oxygen tanks off the trails near, and leading to, Mount Everest. This is such a noble cause, no one will deny you forgiveness for not answering a few mundane messages. You may even be off the hook for some time after you return from your heroic deed.
All of the above are great ways to ghost in style. Be aware though, you can’t just come out of your office and tell someone whom you ghosted, “I was off serving on a jury,” or any other outlandish thing. It does you no good to lie. You have to actually get out and do something. To lie is only slightly less vile than to ghost.
To find a noble, adventurous, real reason is to do it in style.
Xenosthesia.com 